Not A Chance by Maggie Millus

Sometime I wonder about myself, how I can get myself into situations that are going to make me miserable. Like camping. Now I have nothing against camping but if there is a motel around and my car hasn’t broken down in the middle of a national forest, I’m going to go with the motel. One without bedbugs, please.

Cerebral Night Sweats by Maggie Millus

It’s the middle of the night- 2 AM precisely- and I can’t sleep. I’m sitting in the dining room, in the dark, and thinking. Thinking … Thinking hard… Cerebral night sweats is what I call it. What else can you do if you’re in the dark? And besides, there’s lots to think about. Assuming you are all alone. (If you’re not alone, there are other things to do, depending on who you are with and how much trouble you want to get into.)

Just Passing Through by Maggie Millus

This week I had an important reminder that I was not immortal. One of Murphy’s Laws hit me right upside my head: “If everything is going right, you must have overlooked something.” The reason for all this rumination: I had a health issue. Now it didn’t kill me, but for a while I thought I was going to die and I may have even wished I could. All because of kidney stones.

What The ???

I love going to Home Depot and Lowe’s. Almost more than Macy’s or Nordstrum’s… I can’t say Neiman Marcus because I don’t have the big bucks for that store. And besides, I can’t wear a size 0 or size 2. These days I’m more into home improvement. I look at interior design magazines and I get fantasies – fantasies what my house could really look like. Fantasies of how I could keep my husband, Howard, busy, one project after another…forever.

Goth Toe by Maggie Millus

This was one of those days. Would you believe I have another goth toe? Goth toe??? You’ve never heard of that? A goth toe is what you get when you injure your toe, the nail or rest of it, and it turns black. This is not to be confused with yellow or grunge toe which is when your toenail gets infected with fungus.

10 Seconds by Maggie Millus

There are at least 10 things I will not think about in my last 10 seconds of life. I usually don’t have enough time for that kind of nonsense, and hopefully I will continue to exist for more than 10 seconds after I write this. But because I like lists, here are the big 10.